November 19, 2015

Have you ever been selfie-shamed?

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Here are just a few comments I get from people on the reg. Most of the time it is just random acquaintances, but it also my actual IRL friends who mock me about not being able to pass a mirror without taking a little snap whilst we’re sharing a bottle of vino. People in general who have clearly picked up on the fact that I do take a lot of photos of myself.

Most comments aren’t rude though, just tongue in cheek and it is funny, to be fair. It’s not mean, but it is a comment on a habit:

  • “Woah! Sometime LOVES a selfie!!!”
  • “More pictures of you, eh?”
  • Me: “Oooh this picture of some cheese has loads of likes.” Friend: “Maybe that’s because it’s not of your mug for once.” *we both fall about laughing*
  • “Just how many selfies a day are you averaging!?”

Yep! Hands up! You got me! I’m gonna put it out there: I do like posting photos of myself. That is obvious. Anyone who has a blog, an over-sharey Twitter account and writes about herself a lot will probably enjoy snapping their outfits, or their faces a lot. Yes I do post a lot of selfies. My Instagram feed is a whole lot of me. I don’t do double up though, to be fair – I’m not that bad. But if I’ve got sent a blue lipstick in the post you’d be MAD not to want to post a selfie wearing that badboy on Instagram. Sometimes I just get bored of the passive aggressive comments in person when you come out of the loo and they’re like: “in there taking lots of selfies were ya?” with a knowing wink. For people that don’t “get” the whole taking selfies thing, I’m sure it is slightly confusing. Why is this girl taking so many photos of her face and posting them online? No-one cares! Self-obsessed MILLENIAAAAAL! But hey, the Internet sadly let’s us post what we want, so there’s no way to stop me. *evil cackle*

In short, all these people who made a little dig could be called selfie-shamers. Someone not quite understanding your obsession with your own face. Just like I sometimes gym-shame people because I don’t understand being obsessed with moving your thighs so aggressively. The thing is: it’s not as vain as people make out. I like looking at other people’s selfies. My friends, people I enjoy following: it depends on who it is. That’s because posting a selfie doesn’t mean you’re obsessed with how you look. It could be funny, or un-edited, or just a little expression to say HERE I AM! HELLO! I obviously wouldn’t be interested in following the selfies of someone who I don’t feel connected to in some way – it’s kind of pointless. I don’t follow random models with chiselled faces because I don’t find that sort of thing inspiring. Selfies of Oprah in her tortoiseshell glasses or Lena Dunham’s post-run selfie make me want to cuddle them! Maybe having a few selfies sprinkled on your timeline is a way of making sure the right people are following you – the people who don’t mind putting up with your endless selfies. My old colleague once said something quite sweet: “whenever I like someone’s selfie it’s like my little act of support.” It made me laugh.

Are we over thinking things? YES. Thinkpieces about selfies are flying around left right and centre. Are selfies “empowering?” Not really. Should we stop editing our selfies? Potentially. Is it bad iPhones have a front camera? No. Is it making us more narcissistic? Maybe. Is it bad that young girls put so much pressure on themselves to take a good selfie? Probably. (It’s normal for young girls to want attention, and now it’s just digital head-fuck as well in person.) Are we trying to craft our identities through selfies? Maybe, but that’s kind of fun. Am I bad person if I take a picture of myself wearing all the sunglasses I own? No. Do people have to follow me? No. Is it a way of wanting to feel validated? Probably yes. Should you judge someone for their choice to take selfies? No. Do selfies make you happy? If yes – GO TAKE SOME MORE.



  1. Becks says:

    I totally get you! I’m the other way – I can rarely take a selfie I’m happy with so I think I’m doomed to be one of those people who has next to no photos of me to show the grandkids. New Year’s Resolution to take more, maybe?

  2. Beckie says:

    Great post! I love a good selfie – and always get slightly embarrased when people call me ‘selfie queen’ etc, I don’t want them to think I’m vain! If anything I’m quite the opposite! x

  3. Erin says:

    Selfie shamers are the worst… I’m not sure why people loving themselves bothers them so much. They’re just miserable assholes.

    I actually think your instagram has a good ratio of photos and selfies. I try to keep my ratio at a decent level; of my most recent 12 photos 3 are selfies (all instant photos).

    Erin |

  4. Becky says:

    Great post! i’m partial to a cheeky selfie!!

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